Living for the weekend

Friday Five: Clojure, smilies and melting bridges

Elliot Bentley
ios6-maps1

It’s time to unwind for the weekend with our increasingly off-topic collection of links from around the web.

It’s time to unwind for the weekend with our increasingly
off-topic collection of links from around the web.

1. A Clojure library to “shake your shell”

Okay, let’s start off the Five with something mildly relevant.
Shake is a Clojure library which,
author Sun Ning claims
, allows every program to be a
function.

There’s a lot of fun in implementing this library. First, to be
able to use custom symbol in the DSL, you have to make these
executables as macros. Second, find a way to programmably create
vars which are named by string. The power of Clojure enables all
the ideas and makes it possible

Reaction on Hacker News was mixed, though, with user jcromartie
describing it as
a “really bad idea”. You can have a go yourself with the source
on github – we’re
not guaranteeing anything, though.

2. Happy Birthday to :-)

Apparently, today is the 30th birthday of the first emoticons,
smiley :-) and sad :-(. Scott Fahlman of Carnegie Mellon
University, Pittsburgh, originally proposed them in 1982 as a means
to make jokes distinguishable on a bulletin board. They’ve come a
long way in the past three decades, though Fahlman
told
UK newspaper The Independent that modern illustrated and
animated smilies are “ugly” and “ruin the challenge of trying to
come up with a clever way to express emotions using standard
keyboard characters”. What we think remains to be settled is how to
utilise smiley emoticons when contained at the end of a
parenthesis. ( like this? :-)) ( or integrated with the bracket?
:-) ( or avoiding the problem altogether by reversing it? (-: )

3. The amazing iOS 6 maps

You’ve surely seen it already, but we couldn’t ignore this harsh
(but fair) tumblr collecting the many issues of iOS 6’s new
maps app
– from missing geographic info to overlooking of
landmarks and (most hilariously) bridges appearing to collapse and
melt into nothing.

There’s not much more to say – the tumblr speaks for itself
fairly well – but we do hope that Apple manage to rectify the
situation. Or at least make sure all of central London’s tube
stations are marked!

4. Fox discovers overlooked iPhone 5 features

In related iPhone news, here’s an
exciting new feature most publications have overlooked in their
reviews of the new gadget: a holographic keyboard and screen. Well,
that’s according to Fox 5, that highly reputable source of news.
Their coverage of the release hype included not only the
ridiculously long queues outside Apple Stores, but footage of an
iPhone projecting a fully-functional keyboard onto a flat surface,
and even a sizable screen into the air.

 

We imagine most JAXenter readers would
have smelt a rat by this point – especially since the clip in
question is from a CGI
‘concept’ from Aatma Studio
with over a million views on
YouTube – but it appears Lidia Curanaj failed to even consult
Apple’s own promotional materials. Hopefully not too many Fox 5
viewers will be let down by their new holograph-less iPhone 5.

5. The internet’s guide to doing life
the right way

And finally… a BuzzFeed article
entitled ‘22
Things You’re Doing Wrong’
has been making its way around JAX
towers, featuring a selection of clever methods of carrying out
everyday tasks in the home, from cleaning blenders (duh, just make
it blend soapy water!) to eating cupcakes (erm, cut them in half
and turn them into a sandwich?) picked from around the interwebs.
You’ll have seen a few before on Reddit, probably, but there’s
actually some practical use from this particular bit of
silliness.

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